Fresh Prince cheats with Jazzy Jeff. PSYCH!

This post is not funky fresh! It has been a week since the news of Will Smith and Jada Pinkett-Smith’s alleged separation. I have now had the appropriate time to reflect on the situation. If Will and Jada get divorced I will loose it. I freak-yeah love them! I refuse to believe that Jada cheated with Mark Anthony. He is just not attractive. period. I think I am having a strong reaction to this because Will and Jada are one of my favy couples in Hollywood. Not to mention their kids rock my socks off! (For the record, Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner are my favorite Hollywood couple. Will and Jada are probs second.)

Say it isn't so!

Back to the kiddos:

Just take a moment to reflect on Jayden Smith’s cameo in that J.Biebs song. Come on people, you know it was the best / you love to sing along to J.Biebs. Please admit that you saw Never Say Never 3D. My people saw it! We didn't see it in 3D but none the less, it was an outing. We were the only ones in the theatre on a week night and we danced and sang along! And I can’t forget my love for little Willow Smith. Gurl totally represented the hair flip in her song, ‘Whip My Hair.’ A slightly annoying song… but I love myself a good hair flip.



Awesome looking fam/ awesome pants! haha

It is true that Will Smith does the same movie over and over again. Those premieres probably get old… but who wouldn’t want to stay married to the Fresh Prince!? I hope these rumors are false… although, I doubt they are.

Brunch in Bridgetown: Mother's

Mother's Bistro and Bar is another popular spot in Portland. I promise to do some obscure ones eventually. I have just been really generic the past few weeks in my dining choices.

The only way to do Mother's is with one other person. If you go with more than two, you are looking at an hour+ wait. BUT if you go with two, you can usually grab a seat at the bar within 10min. The bar at Mother's is first come, first serve. You may have to get a little friendly with a stranger, but whatever! Once you dig in you won't care that they have their elbow all up in your space. Again, bomb BM. They use pepper infused vodka in their homemade mix. I didn’t have one yesterday though. It seems that people really rave about the mimosa/ bellini options. They have 7 different sparkling wine/ champy bevs on their drink menu. And as I sit at the bar for brunch (regularly) those are the most frequently made drinks. I am not a big breakfast drinker, but champy with fruit puree sounds like a winner to me! I am a big coffee drinker. One of the perks of mothers is the French press for two (Helzer's also offers a French press). Perfect for the bar sitting duo! Yesterday we ordered the Holler Mountain brew. It was outstandingly smooth and delicious. 

The ambiance of Mother's is less trendy than Screen Door. You are more likely to see sundresses vs. skinny jeans or American Apparel. But isn’t that just the east/west divide? Think velvet and chandeliers. It is a beautiful spot. There are more families, couples and groups of girls. People show up with cakes for celebrations to hand off to the hostess etc. If your parents are in from out of town, take them to Mother's. I do love the friendly atmosphere of this establishment. When my friend and I sat down. One of the bartenders may or may not have said “welcome back girls!” While the other said “salmon hash right? How do you want your eggs today?” Does this mean we go there too much?  

Back to the important stuff. What to order! My favy meal at Mother's is the wild salmon hash. I will go on the record and say it is the best breakfast dish in the city of Portland. Please, I welcome a challenge to this statement. It is AMAZING. Fresh salmon. Not smoked. This is the big difference. A lot of places carry smoked salmon hash. Vom. It does not compare to the fresh salmon hash at Mother's.

Take a looker:

Our delish French press coffee.

Yummy yummy wild salmon hash.

Mar and her (vegan) veggie scramble w/ avocado.

After our meal I got into a discussion with my neighbor at the bar. He was raving about the cornflake crusted French toast. Yes, it looked delicious. He gets it every time and I told him that I get the salmon hash every time. We discussed savory vs. sweet breakfasts. I prefer savory. Not because I don’t like sweet breakfasts, but because you can generally make versions of sweet breakfasts yourself. Pancakes, French toast etc. My mother taught me that if you are going out to eat you should order something you wouldn’t make at home. If you are spending money on your meal, you should make it count! The crab cake benedict from Seasons and Regions or the wild mushroom omelet with fresh herbs and goat cheese from Besaw's are two things I wouldn’t make myself. The omelet is a bit more likely, but who goes to the store and buys a variety of wild mushrooms for a random breakfast dish? The heavenly wild salmon hash from Mothers fits perfectly into this category. It is too much work to make yourself. And even if you tried, you would not be able to replicate the perfection that is this dish. Instead of a review of the restaurant this post turned into a rant about good breakfast… whatevs. My breakfast this weekend was da bomb!

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Very Pinteresting.

So you need outfit inspiration or a new recipe? Where should you go? Pinterest. It is where all of the pretty things on the internet hang out. It is the new hot spot of the Internet. For you wildcats, think roof top on a Thursday night. Everyone wants to see and be seen on some Pinterest pin boards. How special do you feel when you get re-pinned by a stranger? Such a compliment, it means you have good taste…Or at least the same bad taste as someone else. My darling sister welcomed me into the world of Pinterest a while back. Listen ladies: you no longer have to be held down by copying and pasting an image and emailing it to yourself! You see something you like? Pin that bologna!

I took this from life is reed-iculous. She is awesome! Appropriate image for this post.

I don’t pin that much and all the britches that I follow pin the same crap because they read the same blogs. BUT if you go to the “everything” page or use the search option you can find AWESOME things. If you don’t have a Pinterest yet you are behind the times, email me if you need an invite! I’m happy to spread the pinning joy. Slater gators!

PS. TGIF! (Not the show. Just the saying... since it is Friday and all.)

The rapids ahead are not yet rated.

My dear friend Ben is a river person. I don’t mean like scary possessed river people that live in the currents and grab the ankles of unsuspecting humans. I mean he grew up spending a lot of time on the water. You know, some families are ski people or golf people etc. Well, Ben grew up on the McKenzie River near Eugene and they (Ben and his twin sis Teagan) grew up rafting. Selfish moment: I love that they were raised like this because I get to benefit from it! Ben knows how to “read the river.” For example, I think we are about to hit branches or rocks, but he knows otherwise. He was a raft guide for at least one summer during college and all that good stuff. In addition, Ben likes to take his friends on killer raft trips. I have participated in the day trips down the McKenzie a few times. But I only journeyed on a week long trip down the Rouge once. No matter what suits you best, they are all too much fun for words.

Ben (the river person/ raft guide extraordinaire)

Besides the games, songs and PB sandwiches, you get to live a little bit adventurously for a short period of time.

5 things I learned on the McKenzie River (2011 addition):

1. Do not blow the whistle attached to your life jacket. If you do so repeatedly, people will get annoyed and threaten you. OR they will think you are drowning.

2. My sister is crazy. Well, I may have known this previously. But I learned that my sister (on the river) will body check you during rapids. Basically, do not sit in front of her because her paddle will leave a mark on your back or a bruise on your leg.

3. PB and honey sandwiches taste better outside.

4. Apparently nudity is accepted. Maybe it was because we were near Eugene… but there was def a nude lady sitting on the river bank at one point.

5. Circus Animal cookies are AMAZING! Remember those? (the pink and white ones with sprinkles) We brought some with and they were killer. Buy them. It will take you back/ they are delish.

The one day adventure of 2011 was as fabulous as any. We drove south on Friday evening after work and stayed at Ben’s folk’s home. There was food and wine in play that evening, as well as good conversation. Then we got up bright and early for some breakfast and river time!

Take a looker here:

The most hard core rafting crew EVER.

Action shot. Note: so hard core/ not wearing life jackets.

BFF4L (best friends forever for life) Duh.

Ben, since I personally added my blog to your home page... yeah, I'm that girl. I am hoping that you read this/ love it. Thank you so much for taking us down the river! We love you!

God made mud, God made dirt, God made guys so girls can flirt!

So I had some questions about flirting. I myself have never mastered the craft. These are some notes that I think apply across the board… but who knows!? I take cues from my friends (also single), church (pastors are usually married and have forgotten what it is like out there), magazines (not real life) and TV (also not real life). SO… I am obvi at a loss when it comes to flirting expertise.

What I have learned in my 24 years of life. Smiling probably helps. As long as it isn’t an all-teeth smile that scares them away. You know, due looking all crazy and such. Laugh when they aren’t funny because it helps to be encouraging BUT do not get all extreme with the laughing. No one wants to see a cocktail coming out of your nose. Finding common interests… OR making some up? My interests aren’t that common. Wait, doesn’t every guy love reality TV, celebrity gossip and cheerleading? Not so much. I feel like when meeting someone new you should be good at things. And if you aren’t good at things… lie about it? Haha! I mean, they can learn the truth after they have fallen in love with your charm and hilarity! Right?!

At this point they are at least interested. Now you suggest a book. This means you can read (and probably did not attend Portland Public Schools). I rarely get to this point and once I post this I will probably Google “books to suggest to boys.” Okay, so now you are going to be friends on Facebook… Do not poke! Never poke… so creepy.

Does anyone have good flirting tips or hilarious disaster stories? I will ask some of my people and get back to you. This may warrant another post.

"You're not going to Space Camp but at least you've got those remote control trucks and your confidence."- Kirk Fogg

(Kirk Fogg was the host of Legends of the Hidden Temple)

Over the Christmas holiday I was given the first season of Boy Meets World on DVD. Oh.Emm.Gee. I am telling you right now, that poo is hilarious. No wonder we loved it! Cory+Topanga=LOVE. It takes me back to those evenings of TGIF. What a line up! The 90s were the best! Boy Meets World, Sabrina, the Teenage Witch, Full House, Step by Step, Dinosaurs etc. Are you freaking kidding me!? Now that was good TV. Just pause and think about the baby from Dinosaurs. What was that? What a weird show. Remember when the brother was trying to prove that the world was round and walked all the way around the earth? Ummm excuse me?... I was never great at geography, but I am pretty sure that isn’t possible…

I would also like to inform you that a channel called TeenNick is bringing back our old favy shows. Apparently they are on “late night”… does that mean we are old enough to have our own version of Nick at Nite? Lord help us, we are getting old. This segment with vintage programming will be called The 90s are All That. Click Here for a trip down memory lane.

Here is a list of what shows have been featured in the promo:

(I bolded my favorites)

Aaahh!!! Real Monsters

The Adventures of Pete & Pete

The Amanda Show

Are You Afraid of the Dark

Cat Dog

Double Dare

GUTs

Hey Arnold!

Hey Dude

Legends of the Hidden Temple

The Ren and Stimpy Show

Rocket Power

Rockos Modern Life

Rugrats

Salute Your Shorts

The Secret World of Alex Mack

Weinerville

How amazing is this!? I wish I had access to this channel. Why is it that the grand prize of the competition shows was always a trip to space camp? Okay, just to prove to you how much I loved Legends of the Hidden Temple. Check out Halloween circa ’07:

The lovely purple parrots. Libby was clearly jacked for Halloween!

Climbing treacherous territory (the stairs of the white apts)

Blue barracudas and a red jaguar

My fellow red jaguar

Remember how hard it was for those idiots to put together the silver monkey? Haha! It was 3 pieces! And the other prizes were a pair of Sketchers or a humungous “portable” boom box AKA Ghetto Blaster that took like 6 huge batteries. My sister got a boom box for Christmas once. I was still in the doll phase, but that boom box was giant super cool.  After receiving this boom box from Santa, we promptly went to Tower Records so she could get the newest Boys II Men CD.

I feel like I have left out so many good shows in this post. I mean, all my love to Saved by the Bell and Ghostwriter etc. I just don’t have time. I sort of feel that Saved by the Bell deserves its own post. You know? As I write this, I realize that I probably watched too much TV as a child. Maybe that is why I am so bad at math?...

PS. TV isn't all bad. Think about how much you learned from Wishbone!

Yikes! I am going to Powell’s tonight to get a book. It will be my weak attempt to compensate for this obscenely ridiculous television related post.

"Feeding wildcat nation the celebrity gossip it's hungry for?"... not really.

I have a strange hobby. I also consider it a gift. I can retain the most useless information EVER. I really enjoy entertainment news, celebrity gossip if you will. Do I know basic math? No. (Again, I choose to blame Portland Public Schools). BUT I know celebrities, their significant others, their babies names etc.

This hobby of mine was significant enough to warrant a gig. I was in a radio class for my mass comm. major. In this class I/ we (my co-host) decided that we should host a celebrity gossip radio show. It was a BLAST! I mean, nobody listened… but who freaking cares!? I had fun and although useless, I got to talk about something I actually knew about.

I think I inherited this strange love of pop culture. My Aunt is also really good at retaining information from popular culture. Maybe it is because we both love tabloids. Maybe it is because we both like to watch TV and stay up on what the “new thing” is. It is always fun to goof around and catch up with her because we talk about things that we “know about” as if it is happening to our closest and dearest friend or neighbor, even though these celebs have no idea that we exist on God’s green earth.

Do I love E! News? YES! Do I love to read D.O.N.? YES! I have been reading her blog since 2006. She is the best because she keeps up with the happenings of my favy celebs, while also briefing us on the important things. ie. What they are wearing and who they were with while wearing it. You should follow her blog. She is fabulous!

These are my favorite weekly mags. They contian hard hitting news. clearly.

I am sure there are more productive ways to spend my time. Volunteering, helping the needy and feeding the children. What do you expect me to do!? I gotta keep up with my gurl Britney? She needs me too. If I am not there watching her every move, who is going to make sure she is making positive life choices? Well, probably someone she knows in real life, but still.

Fact: I still checked up on celebrity news whist in Nicaragua. Feel free to judge me. You absolutely should! Just remember, you too will be judged… I think I read that somewhere. And He has WAY more power than little old me.

Okay, story time:

Once my sister was with a group of her girlfriends when she called me randomly and (for some reason) I picked up. She asked who played Harriet in Harriet the Spy (Rosie O’Donnell Version). My response went something like this: “Michelle Trachtenberg. Duh.”

Sometimes I forget that not everyone retains useless/ pointless information so easily. If only I used my powers for good rather than evil…

“Ma’am this is your insurance card, not your ID.”

I am a psycho. I really am. I am about to admit a little bit of crazy right here. I take my medical insurance card with me EVERYWHERE. I am serious right now. I know this is totally bananas... but for as long as I have been going out to bars or to parties in college etc. (uh…errr… obvi post 21 only) I have been taking my medical insurance card with me. I mean, you never know! What if I need it!? What if I somehow drink too much? What if I get roofied? What if I have a dance-off and twist my ankle when I decide that it's time to bust out a back-handspring? (This one is actually quite likely). These are all totally plausible right!? Right. I agree. That is why I take my insurance card. I switch it to every clutch, wallet, wristlet, satchel, tote… okay, you get the idea.

Out in Vegas circa 2009. See the eel skin clutch? Guess what was inside!?

I encourage you to do the same. It's just good sense!

Brunch in Bridgetown: Screen Door

This will be a series. Not exactly weekly, but sporadically (See, sporadic means once in a while. Try using it in a sentence today.) That was another Clueless reference. Please rent that movie if you still don’t get it. Anywho, I freak-yeah LOVE brunch. My favorite Portland places create a long list. I have tried a lot of places and have some favorites.

This week’s addition is about Screen Door, mostly because I went there yesterday. But it is one of my favy b-fast spots. Screen Door is a well known eatery and no matter what, you are looking at a 45min- hour long wait. Like most places in Portland, they offer cups of that legal addictive stimulant that we all love, coffee. They serve Stumptown Coffee. Bomb.co.uk. More importantly, they have a killer bloody mary. And if you don't like vodka with your breakfast, you can always order a virgin mary! Screen Door also has food... weird. My favorite being their hipster style grits. I mean this in the most loving way possible of course. It is southern cooking with creole undertones and Portland flare. Their chicken and waffles are amazeballs. Cajun seasoned chicken and a sweet potato waffle to accompany. Savory breakfast with sweet maple syrup on the side… if you are one of those. (You know, those freaks who like kettle corn/ mixing salty and sweet).

mmmmm bloody mary

My personal fave is the delectable dish called garden grits. My favorite food is cheese (insert gasp here)… everyone already knows this fun fact. Grits are freaking cheese for breakfast! AND they have the texture of polenta. I mean, you can get plain grits too. But why would anyone do that when they could get cheese grits!? More often than not, grits are super greasy. Not at screen door! (only moderately greasy) They make theirs with provolone, spinach, mushrooms and tomatoes… soooo melt in your mouth delish. If you don’t believe me go try it. If you are more of a carnivore type, they also have farm grits. They come complete with ham and poached eggs. If you decide to go, tell our friends Patrick and Sam hi! Yes, over the past couple years my people have made friends with the bar tenders (Libby gave one of them her card once. It was hilar… don’t tell Chris)

Partially eaten garden grits.

Chels and her fried oyster benedict/ BM in hand.. of course.

Now, I encourage you all to start brunching. It is really fun to explore our fine city while simultaneously indulging in this gluttonous weekend ritual.  

PS. I know my grammar isn't great. Try not to judge too harshly.

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Tears are the sign of a cinematic great.

Last night I saw The Help with my sister and her co-worker my new BFF Anne (with an E, like Anne of Green Gables).  I was beyond excited to see this movie. I loved the book, and by book I mean audio book. Side note: I commute to work and love listening to audio books. It makes car time much more enjoyable. That, and radio DJs are the absolute worst. Listening to my iPod is okay I guess. But when it is early I would much rather zone to a story and sip my coffee. It is either that or lame attempts to be alert enough to sing along to something. IMO singing and car dancing should be saved for the drive home.  Also, I need to listen to books because I went to Portland Public schools and never learned to read. (This is clearly a yoke. I can read… sort of)

Back to The Help. I thoroughly enjoyed this film. Yes film. I cried twice! Well, I cry often… so that isn’t saying much and probably shouldn’t be what defines it as a film/ cinematic great. I must admit that I cried when I watched Cheaper by the Dozen (that is the lamest movie I can think of that I cried at).

The Help was incredibly well made. The time period, the clothes, the food. I was very pleased. I went in with extremely high expectations and was not disappointed. There were a few things that bugged me though. Why do screen writers change things that don’t need to be changed? Like names etc. It adds nothing to the story! Idiots. Also, they took out a lot of the fear that was communicated in the written story. The screen writers decided to gloss over a lot of the racial tension that was highlighted so well in the novel. It isn’t a secret that things were volatile in Mississippi in the 1960s. At least they left the historical events in there. But that was really it. I guess I understand the need for mass appeal in order to make good money/ be a box office hit.  

Anyway, go see it. It was awesome! One of the best moments was after the credits rolled. I turned around and looked at the audience. It was a theatre full of women and as I glanced around EVERYONE was wiping tears off of their faces (myself included). It was hilar! I would say, all those tears means it's a film worth seeing.

PS. Emma Stone is my new Rachel McAdams. Still love Rach, but need to make some room for Emma.

Perla, mi amiga y mi hermana.

Another life changing experience for the books.

I love the company I work for. I was blessed with an amazing job. I do admin and it obviously gets tedious but recently I had the opportunity to go to Nicaragua with one of the mission teams. This trip was extra special because not only did I need it in my personal life, but I also needed it in my job. I am now better at my job because I went. I know about being on location and I was refreshed in knowing that the tedious tasks I do in the office actually have a purpose.

The organization I work for sends short-term mission teams to developing countries and have local partnerships all over the world.  I work in the teams department and specifically work with group leaders, team facilitators and our field staff. I assist all of our Team coordinators and help get teams out the door and to location.

I had the opportunity to go to Managua and Leon Nicaragua. I went with one of our repeat teams that annually go on a specialty trip. They go north to an area called Leon, a poor more rural area where they serve at a local church and in the community. We camped for 5 days in the hottest region of Nicaragua during rainy season. It was um… challenging, but also an amazing experience that definitely took me out of my comfort zone. 

That is the thing about comfort zones though. Doesn't God want us outside our comfort zones all the time? If we are truly serving the Lord shouldn't we always be required to be a little uncomfortable? If there is no feeling of uncertainty how are we really trusting God with our lives?

Anyway, back to Leon.

Note: Rain in Nicaragua is not as friendly as it is here in Oregon.  Yes, it is hot as it rains in Nicaragua, but the rain also comes down in sheets.  These aren't just big drops. If it started raining while we were trying to have a discussion we would have to give up. Seriously buckets of rain ricocheting off of the tin roofs.

Some awesome camping stories came out of this trip.  I am not the strongest of campers… to say the least.  I am used to fluffy camping in the NW where there are bathrooms and showers, and if not showers at least a lake or river to feel clean (and NW camping is sometimes a struggle for me).  I was pushed and God used it to help me bond with other team members who were in the same boat.  I don’t like being smelly… but at least we all smelled. I was forced to become familiar with, what we like to call, “baby-wipe bathing.” Basically we all smelled like B.O., baby butts, sunscreen and bug spray.

Our camp

One of our work sites

The kitchen where our AMAZING food was cooked. How they made those delicious meals over a fire is beyond me.

The team was fantastic! They have been coming to this community for a number of years and members of the community couldn’t wait to greet their old friends. We did a medical clinic, VBS, and one of our team members, Patricia, taught a quilting class to the women of the church. The women were captivated by Patricia. I will just let the pictures speak for themselves.

Cuddles with the kiddos.

FEI Staff hanging out in the medical clinic.

The kids just wanted to hang out. No effort needed. But a game or two always helps.

Patricia with her dear friend in Leon.

Patricia and her quilting class.

This woman and her husband have been married for over 60 years.

Leaving Leon with tearful goodbyes.

As amazing as my time in Leon was, my time in Managua was even more impactful.

In Managua we serve in the city dump. There is an entire community within the city dump, La Chureca. We have a home for girls in Managua called Villa Esperanza. This home is a safe haven for girls that God has rescued from the Dump through FEI. In La Chureca teenage girls are at risk. They are threatened by the garbage truck drivers, abuse, drug use etc. Many parents encourage their daughters as young as 12 and 13 to sell their bodies to the drivers for money or for the first pick of garbage.

Recently we had a photographer (Marianne Bach) take photos of La Chureca. Here are a few.

A home in the dump.

Heading to work to collect trash.

The girls that we house in the Villa Esperanza (village of hope) are the most amazing girls I have ever met. They have so much spirit and joy, yet they come from dyer circumstances. (Shameless plug: Click to sponsor a child!)

Lindsay, our child sponsorship director, with all of the girls living at the Villa.

The most meaningful relationship I built was with Perla. Perla is the oldest girl living at the Villa. Knowing her story, spending time with her, and developing a true friendship with her changed me. I have gone on mission trips before. Never on those trips did I connect with another individual near my age as an equal and sister. We talked (with difficulty due to the language barrier) like I would talk with any of my friends, or how I talk to my cheerleaders. It wasn’t a kid at VBS or a woman my senior. It was a teenager who could be my younger sister.

A portrait of Perla. (Taken by Marianne)

On the last night in Managua we had dinner with the girls. At the end of dinner Gloria, the Villa director, welcomed us to go pray for the girls and shared that the girls may pray for us as well. Immediately, Perla stood up and walked over to me. She came over and began praying for me in Spanish. I immediately burst into tears. It was so incredibly powerful. I then tearfully prayed for her. (I mean ugly cry) We sat there crying, hugging and holding hands until the girls were excused to go back to their houses.

Right after all of the praying and crying. I love her!

My trip to Nicaragua was wonderful and there are a lot of things I am leaving out. Actually, I pretty much left out all of the funny things because the serious ones just seemed more important. I have no idea what my future holds. It is easy for me to want to be in control and need to know what is next. But that’s not my job it’s His.

Does the clay say to a potter, "What are you making?" Isaiah 45:9

The outside world just doesn’t get the joke. Fishism.

Well actually, I’m the one who didn’t get the joke. Just a few years late (13ish), but I am currently watching Ally McBeal on Netflix. It is available under the watch instantly option. It seriously rocks. What’s not to love!? I am only on season 3 so don’t ruin it! I am now just getting many pop culture references from the past. For example, that dancing baby! Everyone remembers the dancing baby. A few of my people are watching as well. My gurl Marina mentioned that the dancing baby even showed up at the Emmys one year! We had no idea it was from Ally McBeal. Also, Billy just bleached his hair, as did my entire 7^th grade class. It just all makes sense to me all of a sudden. Why was that ever a good idea? Yes, I would like to dip my head (which contains my brain) into a bucket of chemicals! Perfectly reasonable. Not to mention it turned their hair yellow instead of blonde. Now, go be a normal person and have the chemicals painted on like the rest of us!

Anyway, my favorite character is Elaine. She is just wacky! So you don’t want wrinkles right? Wear a face bra. Duh.

We were just too young when Ally McBeal aired. But seriously, watch it. You won’t be disappointed.

The higher the hair, the closer to God.

The idea of the beauty shop has been in American culture forever. (So for me that means the past 24 years). A place where women flock to get their hair cut, colored and “set.” Whatever that means. Nowadays people go get a blowout or a weave. The beauty parlor has been the hub of gossip, drama and practically a therapist’s office for generations. I think of pink curlers, tile floors and plastic salon chairs. I can practically smell the perm solution! The beauty shop has a stronghold in our culture. Why else would E! consider Queen Latifah’s C-list movie Beauty Shop a “Movie we Love.” For reals!? From 08-09 every time I changed the channel to E! They were freaking playing Beauty Shop. It turned into a household joke in college. It is just not good enough to be on TV that much.

The idea of a beauty shop, or what we now call a salon, is a haven away from our busy lives. You get to read a magazine, sip a glass of red wine or Diet Coke, relax and leave looking like a whole new person! In movies they reference things they heard at the salon. Not only did Elle Woods get her best encouragement from her manicurist, she taught her salon friends the bend and snap! That is everyone’s favorite part of the film. I say film rather than movie for the obvious cinematic greatness that is Legally Blonde.

The men’s barber shop fulfills the same purpose. It is a safe place to spill the beans. Although, if pop culture has taught me anything, it’s that you probably shouldn’t reveal your deepest darkest secrets at the salon. You never know who is under the drying hood three stations away. I assume this is a much bigger deal in a small town where there is only one place to get your hair done. For me this isn’t an issue and I let it fly when I hit the salon. If you want to know my business just follow me to the salon. I don’t hold back. Especially if there is some wine in me.

My hair dresser is Da’ Bomb! She is not just a stylist she is a friend. For this posts sake let’s call her Micah (names have been changed to protect the innocent… or have they?) Micah has seen me through breakups, makeups, breakups again, more makeups… (I could do that for a while) graduations, my sisters wedding, my time thus far in phase four, some bad dates etc. You get the idea. We get to see her through things too! Old boyfriends, sibling marriages, becoming an aunt for the second time AND she is about to get married in less than a month! So exciting! The best part is that we share a faith. My time in the chair at Micah’s station turns into a time of fellowship. I can talk to her about my relationship with God and she can advise me from a place that I agree with and that I know comes from the heart. She also does my mom, my sister, my roommate, and another one of my gurl’s hair. Just think of the information she holds in that perfectly quaffed head of hers. We better stay on her good side! Micah aka the miracle worker. (AKA should be pronounced with a Minnesota accent ala Drop Dead Gorgeous)

Cross-eyed alien

I happened to get my hair did yesterday. I decided to go blonder. Why not!? I heard somewhere that blondes have more fun. Maybe it's a myth. I will report my findings.  

Go team! Fight fight! Gee, I hope I look alright.

I am a cheerleading coach and this week we start up again. I am sort of ready for this season and sort of not. It is just a big time commitment and I was enjoying my summer. The hardest thing I have been working on this summer (besides actual work) is my tan.

My friends would say that I am obnoxiously upbeat sometimes. Fortunately, they have gotten really good at ignoring it like my family does. I LOVE cheerleading. I love the energy, I love to tumble and I love to dance. Mostly I love my kids and the coaching staff. (Wow, so much love... I may vomit) Anywho, we have so much fun together! The girls respect us and work hard. The coaches have a great dynamic. We are friends, we aren’t afraid to say what we think, we have a lot of fun together and most importantly… we love to win! Wilson has been placing top 3 in state for the past 8 years. We are slightly struggling in our program, but apparently it is a school wide issue. People just can’t afford to get their kids involved in sports. They can’t fork over the “pay to play.” (a sports fee to the school). And with cheer we pay for competitions, gear, travel etc. These families present us with a hefty amount of their hard earned cash! I mean, we do go to Disneyland for nationals after all… isn’t it worth it? Maybe/ maybe not. What is more important… saving for college or high school cheerleading?... I say it’s a toss up.

I attribute this problem to the damned economy. What the heck!? Why hasn’t this been figured out yet? I’m no politician, but we have been talking about/ dealing with this crappy economy for a number of years now. These politicians really should have taken problem solving at George Smith Elementary. Those word problems were tricky! It definitely would have prepped them for this one.

Example:            

If the stock market crashes on a regular basis, if Barack has negative 14 trillion dollars and his land is in debt, if Boehner has a spray tan and an idea and if TSA likes to feel people up. How long does it take Barack and Boehner to wash the car?

It obviously takes more than 3 years. My poor Daddy works in finance. I swear his blood pressure has gone up more in the past 3 years than in his entire life (Don't worry folks, he is healthy). It’s like he was elected president! I mean that he has had a hard few years in the same amount of time as a president would… not that he has actually been elected president. I know I look a lot like Obama, but he isn’t my dad. Sorry to confuse.

How lucky was I that the economy took its stellar dive the year I graduated from college? So lucky! It only took me 9 months to find a job. I was so bored, I probably should have just had a baby. BUT, at least the job I have now is the perfect job hand picked for me by God. I am deadly serious about that one. I work for the best non-profit. I am passionate about what I do and look forward to work. This is rare and I feel blessed! Okay, enough mushy stuff. 

This post started about cheerleading and turned into a post about God. Sounds about right to me!

5^th place at the 2011 USA nationals

Rah Rah Goooooo Team! (Insert high-kick here)

Well, there goes your social life.

If you didn’t get that Clueless reference I am sad. Remember when socializing was more personal? I do. Life before we had texting and gchat. Life before we had Facebook and Twitter. We had to call each other!

OMGEEEE Remember 3-way calling?! Ah, the days of having a friend call a boy you liked (with you on the line of course) and asking if he “like likes” you. Or watching TRL while you try to figure out how to click back over to complete the call. All whilst wondering why Carson Daly only paints 2 of his nails. Now we have social networking. The most impersonal way of being “friends” and staying in touch. Don’t get me wrong, I love it. Minimal effort and you get credit for it! You “like” a photo or status update and you’re set for another 6 months. You wish someone happy birthday and you are off the hook. Talk about a way to keep up on your correspondence! I do miss the Facebook of yesteryear. Remember when it was just college students and we didn’t have to worry about keeping it kosher for our business relationships or potential employers?

Facebook has changed though. I don’t want to be the person who posts a status about their dinner, or about how wonderful their life is. Those people are freaking liars. I know what they are thinking: "I will post about the sunshine and my delicious summer salad even though I have cramps and a huge pimple. People will think my life is perfect!" Well guess what, life isn’t perfect. Let’s admit that we all wait for the ideal profile picture before switching it up. Yes, by chance I look really good here. This is clearly how I look all the time. I never look bad! I don’t think we are tricking anybody. They can click through and see that unflattering photo that hasn’t been untagged. The jig is up.

My main uses for Facebook are these:

1. Post pictures of and for my friends. Also for my mom, she likes to see what we are doing.
2. To creep. Yes, I said it. Who doesn’t love to see that so and so broke up with so and so? I sure do. It’s awesome!
3. To creep some more. I love looking at other peoples pictures. My mind starts saying things like, “cute shirt,” “that looks like fun,” “I want to go camping” OR “dang. She is pregnant?!” OR “gurlfren gained weight.” Yes, facebook is the place of judgment. It is absolutely horrible, yet true. You can’t deny it. It especially comes in handy when your friend’s exes (or your own) have new girlfriends. We can say things like this: “you are WAY cuter than her.” Etc.

Twitter:

I love twitter, mostly because it is less saturated with randoms. And because I can get news, gossip, current events and status updates from people I actually want to know about/ celebs.

One thing I am both thankful for and struggle with is the limit on characters. Twitter only gives you 140 characters. It is hard to be clever in 140 characters or less. At least I think so! I try to at least make my tweets worth reading. My favorite tweeter: Damian Fahey. Ask Nicole from My Little Blue Bag. She will tell you all about his hilarity. He has such a dry sense of humor I llol every time! Well, almost every time.

Due to this socially saturated technological world and the invention of smart phones. My people are constantly consumed by their mobile devices. Phones sit at the table during happy hours, dinners and random TV watching hangouts. Hey, I’m guilty too. It is just pretty ridiculous if you take a minute to think about it.

Now spend the weekend remembering the simpler times and make a 3-way call with some of your people. You won't regret it!